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The London Sex Coach - FAQ's

Do you offer hands-on sex coaching?

No. Matt has no problem with hands-on sex support, but when a therapist or coach does hands-on, it can be messy. If you pardon the pun. It's a tricky boundary to navigate. For hands-on sex support Matt refers to professional sex workers, who are often much better at hands-on sex coaching. It's a 'cleaner' boundary and some of his clients have had some major breakthroughs with this kind of approach. Matt only offers no-hands coaching, which is therapeutic in nature, based upon energetically and emotionally re-connecting with yourself. This increases your connection with your body and therefore enhances sexual enjoyment and often performance.

Does Matt do free sessions?

Sorry, nope. Matt simply isn't in a position to offer free or discounted sessions.

I want to explore kink, can Matt help me with this?

Yes. Matt is personally and professionally experienced with most, but not all, kink, fetish and 'alternative' sex. However, yep, there's a however, as with any sexual practice you might want to explore this can be for one of two reasons - 1) You just fancy trying it and are comfortable with yourself sexually and want to develop or 2) You struggle to climax with 'vanilla' sex but get off easily with kink. This can, not always but can, sometimes be a symptom that there is something deeper going on. If the kink is serving as a distraction to this - Matt will challenge this. He's annoying like that. ;-)

Talking of kink, my partner wants to try it and I don't, can you help me to like it?

Matt is asked this quite often and the easy answer is - that's not really appropriate. If it is something you have genuinely fancied and been curious about, sure, that will probably be fine to support that exploration. It is often the case though, sadly, that one partner is simply trying different sex practices to keep hold of their partner. It can also, sometimes, become quite unhealthy in that one partner is constantly not being true to themselves, and they can become quite lost in this dynamic - of one partner getting what they want sexually and the other giving their power over. Now this is something Matt can help you with - he can support you to come back to 'you' and then you can see more clearly. In this case, you may decide to go it alone and allow a partner who resonates with you to come into your life.

My marriage is in trouble, can you help?

It has to be said that once marriages reach this point - it is not helpful for a therapist to negotiate between the partners in order to fix the relationship. Do not misunderstand this - if there is an obvious miscommunication going on, if both parties are aware of what needs to change - sure. But often, more often than not, the relationship is at a point where each needs to let go. Matt can support you with this and will not bullshit you. If it is salvageable, by his sense and by what you tell him, he will say so. If not, he will also say so. It's important to remember that all relationships, friendships, work relationships, romantic - often have a natural shelf life. It is only the attachment to these that cause us pain. When we truly love - we let go. When we need to (which isn't always when we want to!).

I've been single forever - help!

Want to meet someone? Stop looking. We know, irritating to hear that yes? Matt believes, and has learned by working with thousands of clients, that when we take time out for ourselves, to heal, to get to know who we are - 'they' just appear. The energy system, a part of our whole being, knows what it is doing. Our 'inner being' - that part of ourselves that knows far more than we do - knows what its doing. Sit with those aspects of yourself - and you really can move mountains. Matt will teach you simple, powerful meditation and energy exercises that can transform your energy pretty fast. He has a great track record (excuse the boast) of working with clients to just, be, stop looking, and hey presto, they pop him an email saying they have met someone. Awesome.

What's the difference between this and sex therapy? (Disclaimer in answer)

Matt is a healer in addition to being a counsellor. His therapy training is not sex specific, it's general counselling. His sex expertise comes from a vast hands-on experience and also his deep dive into personal and professional sexual development. So - the simple answer is that he can 'tune in' to you and your sexual energy very quickly and, if appropriate, he can tell you in very real terms what's going on sexually and advise where necessary. This is often much more effective than from a text book. He will often know what the issue is before you have told him. Often - and here comes the disclaimer - the sex issue is not the issue at all. Regardless of whether it is or it isn't - Matt will gently bring you back to centre, by often teaching you how to be mindful, present, using techniques he is very experienced at. Then you will often notice the real issue coming up, for healing. If his was related to the sex issue - often the sex issue will be relieved, at least to some degree. Matt reserves the right to not go in the direction of the sex issue - if this is causing a distraction from the real issue.

Please note - when you dive into the core issue - healing is often quicker, and hits on many levels, than if you had just spent weeks or months analysing the 'sex issue' itself.

Analysis leads to paralysis.

Have a question? Ask Matt - email here or call 07716232865 (for a call-back or to ensure Matt can take your call, please text first).

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